"While riding the wave of life one must also practice stillness to be able to flow with, rather than resist the wave’s motion." (DailyOm)
This very sentence describes the experience of my last 2 months as I have been literally riding a big wave, having to go with the flow, while being in a scary accident, ending up with a broken pelvis among other injuries.
"The universe’s flow can take us to a place in life where we would rather not be. And as the wave rises and falls, we are carried forward, through life’s high and low points."(DailyOm)
Here it is when our inner calm is of most importance while the flow pulls the ground away from under your feet and all you can do is trust the process.
One moment you are on vacation with your husband, the other moment you find yourself in the Emergency Room participating in medical procedures, drugs to keep you calm and the pain at bay. You are part of 'a hectic' at its highest point , while wonderful people around you doing everything to determine the situation to figuring out what’s next….
"When we ride the wave, we are carried by it and our head can “stay above water” as we go wherever it takes us." (DailyOm)
I knew that to try to make the wave stand still or resist its direction , I would end up being trapped into panic and fear.
I was checking in with my body. I was able to move my legs, my neck …. I am not paralyzed !!! What a relief !!!
But my pelvis cracked open like an egg and needed to be put together immediately. The surgeon checks in with me and assured me that I am in good hands. Next thing I know they get me ready for surgery.
"It can be difficult to trust the universe and let go of the urge to fight life’s flow, but you may find it easier to ride the wave if you can stay calm and relaxed. Giving in to life's wave will always take you where you need to go." (DailyOm)
For me in this moment there was just trust and a kind of inner calm, observing, being curious and in amazement , and going with the dynamics of those who were in charge of my very being.
The nurses and first responders and my surgeon where just amazing!
Every single one an Angel ! …
This all happened 2 month ago in San Diego, and I am still amazed of all that, that had been done to nail me back together.
After 5 days I was on my way back home to San Francisco, equipped with a walker and with a lot of drugs in my pocket to keep my pain at bay.
Coming home was just such a relief. My kids , the dogs, the house, the studio and all that nature that surrounds us.... my sanctuary !
I have counted so many blessing over the last 2 months, healing in my bedroom .
My grown kids being of so much love and support. My husband being there , loving and reliable. The dogs, my guardians. And my studio, my creativity, my retreat and savior.
All of this assembles the essence of what I have envisioned for being part of a fulfilling life.
Excluding the waves that take us on some loopy rides. But of course we can't avoid those completely . Life is a journey , it sure is ! We all live it, in its full coming at us, most unexpected...
So I wonder, what does this wave now, like to tell me ?
Going through my recovery I find myself very retreat from life itself. I am kind of in my own bubble, still hurting , still licking my wounds. A place that asks for turning inward , listening, resting, observing, understanding and nurturing the healing of the body, and making sure of a positive mindset.
It took 6 weeks to put the walker into the closet and now I can slowly walk more secure and stairs are getting manageable. I still need a lot of rest and my body is still trying to navigate its bones and joint into the right position. Every step produces cracking and grinding sounds, and movements often feel awkward, its really interesting . Our body is such an amazing organism and observing and supporting its healing is very profound. There is a lot of self-love and deep self-care involved. I have to admit that this is a very big teaching for me. And I know that I am not alone in this.
Having my studio here at home has been a blessing . I have found moments of energy and motivation that got me up and into my creative space. Creativity is such a powerful tool, taking us out of our mind and into our soul. Here I always find answers and my balance. It gives me purpose. I like to create beautiful works that I share with the world. I don't think about time , I just do, with all its ups and downs, with all its moments of joy and discovering. It is the people who enjoy and appreciate my work, and who understand and feel its inspiration and vibration, that gets me going. I love that about my work. I love to be that catalyst of bringing forth energy and expressing it through colors.
I ended up creating some little treasures, perfect for the holidays to be special gifts for special people. And of course for those who like to treat themselves well.
It is such a feeling of accomplishment when after so much time spend and energy invested , to see the blossoming final results.
It is often difficult, when to set my signature under a finished piece. And often there is a long path until fulfillment. But it always feels great to see the fruits of this labor of love.
As I am writing this Blog Post , I am simultaneously preparing my new work for the online store. This part also takes a lot of time behind the scene, lots of preparing and putting together until everything is ready to be seen in the shop. So I'm working on it and it should be accomplished in the next couple of days.
So keep on checking in :)
*****
Some parts in this post are inspired by DailyOm Article